Thu Sep 12, 2013 at 02:24 PM PDT
Louie Gohmert, America's dumbest congressman, gives a speech
attribution: REUTERS
Whatever you do, don't cast aspersions on his asparagus.
Lettuce check in on the further adventures of America's dumbest congressman, Rep. Louie Gohmert. It appears Rep. Gohmert now has an innovative idea to simply defund large parts of the executive branch until someone, somewhere adequately answers for all the various conspiracy theories that rattle around inside Louie Gohmert's head. Defunding Obamacare a few dozen times has gotten boring, after all, and defunding food aid to poor children has been done to death, and Gohmert has come back from his long, dull August break with an entire hive of bees in his bonnet.
[Gohmert] kicked off his speech with the reading of a Wall Street Journal editorial on the IRS.
Louie Gohmert looking to a Wall Street Journal editorial for wisdom is like a mouse deciding to build his home inside a burning tire because it's warm.
Oh, you might say, Mr. Gohmert is going to be speaking about the IRS conspiracy debunked months ago. Understandable; he has always been a bit slow on the uptake. But no, it is actually about Fast and Furious.
Gohmert particularly seemed to single out the Department of Justice for budgetary vengence, saying it hasn't been forthcoming dating back to at least the Fast and Furious gun-running scandal.
That's reaching back a fair ways, but all right. Let's run with that one.
But the massive posters of the four men killed in the 2012 Benghazi attack made their point. "They deserve the truth [about Benghazi] to come out," Gohmert said.
Wait, what?
Gohmert went on to cite a recent Breitbart post which tossed out the idea that the Obama administration may have violated an international law passed in 2011 against shipping weapons in or out of Libya.
Oh no. Now the mouse is smoking meth. You shouldn't smoke meth in a burning tire, Mr. Mouse. (Side note: I'm seeing a fantastic opportunity for a children's book here. The moral lessons I think would really speak to the kids today.)
He then went on to conjecture that members of this administration may find themselves under international indictment for arms-trafficking in Libya, because only Republicans are allowed to deliver arms to rebel forces, and then only in exchange for something good like cocaine or hostages or a second, larger burning tire to live inside of.
This is all just one speech, mind you, but I hopes it further clarifies my certainty as to this man being the dimmest bulb in a collection of dim bulbs. It seems every one of his speeches is like this: you keep thinking he is about to get to a point, but he never does; you keep stumping yourself on how to rebut his arguments because you can't ever quite parse out what the hell they are, or how you would address them in such a way as to not make you look like an equally raving lunatic. I'm almost convinced he's putting us on, a Borat-style genius, but that would imply his entire district was in on it and, as we've seen repeatedly, most of these people do not really comprehend satire.
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